The Big Ass Tote Bag

The Big Ass Tote Bag is the oversized, weirdly-practical carry-everything hauler built from outdoor-grade materials because if you’re going to make a bag this big, you might as well make it indestructible.

Crafted from 220D Gridstop Nylon with a fully lined interior, it’s lightweight, durable, and ready for whatever chaos your day throws at you: laundry, travel, props, groceries, gym stuff, or all of the above at the same time. It comes in six colorways: bright blue, bright white, stealthy black, vibrant purple, grid green, and punchy punchy.

To keep things ergonomic (or as ergonomic as a comically massive bag can be), it features two strap options:

• A long shoulder strap when you’re in hands-free mode

• A short grab handle when you’re dragging this thing out of your trunk like a cartoon character moving house

Perfect for: hauling everything, hauling nothing, and making people stare.